This is A True Story.
Hung out a few times with a friend of a friend who constantly stared at my chest. It was infuriating, and made me more than uncomfortable. I hated it when he was brought along by a friend we really liked, but, hey. We couldn’t tell our friend whom he could and couldn’t bring to concerts, etc.
Once I actually had warning that we’d see him. The night before I saw him for what turned out to be the last time, I formulated a plan. I told my BF about his endless staring, and he got mad. Then I told him my idea, and he laughed, and said it was great.
When the guy showed up, he stared as usual, and I checked to see if my BF noticed. Oh, he noticed, allright! He was clenching his jaw and one fist.
I put my plan into action.
I STARED at the guy – a few inches below his belt buckle.
To my joy, he began to squirm, looking around nervously, putting his hands in his pockets and taking them back out, his hands shook, and his air of anxiety increased by the second. I caught my BF’s eye, and he was stifling laughter.
I stared like that whenever he was standing up, the entire time he was there. His reactions remained the same.
I just hope he learned his lesson.
I'm not saying this was wrong to do, or trying to say the guy was ok, as clearly he wasn't and he got a taste of his own medicine, rightly so.
But wouldn't it have been easier to just talk to him and tell him he's making you uncomfortable?
My BF, who actually knew both of us, never suggested I attempt such a discussion with him.
Trying to discuss things like this with men like him is frustrating, exhausting, and embarrassing. Please try to imagine what it's like, asking someone who towers over you to change their behavior, only to be *laughed at* and dismissed as hypersensitive and be told to "grow up," or "learn to take a 'joke'."
I understand, I guess we don't live in a perfect world, sadly
The world would be far more tolerable were all people treated like human beings.